The Eternal Quest For The Quick Fix

Image by Ross Grady via Flickr

Are you on an endless quest for the quick fix? As a society, we’ve grown increasingly unwilling to put forth the hard work required to improve ourselves. We want simple solutions and immediate feel-good results. We want chicken soup for the soul and fast food for the belly.

The Cursable Case of the Sneak-a-Break

Image by Chernobyl Bob via Flickr

The sneak-a-break is the ultimate indulgence of the chronically passive-aggressive. It’s the Red Ryder carbine-action, two-hundred-shot range model on the Christmas list of cowardice. The sneak-a-break occurs when the person you’re dating wants to break up, but instead of using a backbone, manipulates you into doing the breakup. The human fillet accomplishes this by turning antagonistic, needy, petty, pernicious, surly, edgy, sleazy, queasy, tipsy, dizzy, remorseful, or whatever it takes to drive you away.

Know how to avoid dating disasters

Avoid dating disasters (Photo by Zach Klein via Flickr).

Many people experienced one bad date or two, but for those not so lucky, some endure a dating disaster. A dating disaster is somewhat different from a bad date. A bad date falls along the lines of, “it doesn’t look like this will work,” “we have different points of view,” or “he/she wants more than I’m willing to offer.” However a disaster date can include inner thoughts such as, “How did I end up in this date, I’m going to kill my friend for setting me up,” “I think he/she might actually be crazy,” and “Where are my keys? I’m getting the hell out of here.”

The Curious Case of the Sneak-a-Date

sneaky

Why won’t some guys just sack up and ask you out? Why do they engage in a practice known as the “sneak-a-date”? Here’s why, and here’s what you can do about it.

Five Signs of the Guypocalypse

Image by Rufus Gefangenen

Isn’t it somewhat ironic that the term apocalypse could therefore refer to anything that women understand with ease, but which no man is able to comprehend? Come to think of it, there has to be a Guypocalypse out there: knowledge hidden from all manhood; information that only the fairer, finer, testosteronally-challenged members of humanity are privy to; things that may not spell the end of the world for a guy, but will nonetheless bewilder us to no end.

How Awesome Are You?

Image by Clipart.com

Dating advice columns invariably recommend confidence as a key to impressing the opposite sex. Don’t self-deprecate. Talk yourself up. Confidence is a turn-on. Confidence is sexy. Well, hey, I totally agree. But, just as you can’t make yourself smell sexy by dousing your B.O. with cologne, you can’t make yourself more confident by drowning your low self-esteem in a sea of self-congratulation.

Modern Warfare 2: A girlfriend’s thoughts

It can be a battlefield for girlfriends (Photo via www.joystickdivision.com).

Since last Monday my television has been consumed by the recent release of Modern Warfare 2. For those who don’t know the significance of this game, my boyfriend waited two hours outside of a Gamestop around midnight just to be one of the first people to receive a copy. Along with the $60 to purchase the game, my boyfriend convinced himself that he needed a MW2 specialty controller too. I told him it was like a girl buying a purse with matching shoes, but he begged to differ.

The Mercy of Gift

Image by Clipart.com

We’re not at war. Love isn’t a battlefield. Popular culture would have us round up our troops now, ready to engage the opposite sex in a struggle of psychological proportions. Well, I decline. We’re all human beings, and we’re all from the same planet. We just have to be willing to learn from each other. My goal is to bridge the communication gap between men and women and offer a unique perspective that will let you laugh through the tears.

Can’t Get Fooled Again

hamster wheel

On one of the many dating websites I lurk these days in my never-ending quest for relationship fodder, a cabal of female readers were discussing ways to exact revenge on a cheating boyfriend. One woman proclaimed, with singular pride, that she had devised the perfect strategy: she would sleep with her boyfriend’s best friend. This woman explained that she’d done this three times now, with three different guys, and all three times, she was able to incite the cheating boyfriend into a raging fit.

Walk Away

Picture from Valentine.Ottone vis Flickr

Relationships are difficult, especially breakups. What’s the best way to break up with someone? Walk away. Don’t be a nice guy, or a nice girl. If you ever say to someone, “I just want to be friends,” don’t actually try to be their friend. Just leave them alone and let them hate you for a while. That’s what they need to do in order to heal.